Thulo Manche


I’m so sorry for disappearing. I know when I get attached to a blog I feel frustrated when the writer is unexpectedly absent for long stretches of time, so I hope I haven’t lost too many readers.

Friends have been prompting me to beginning blogging again. RH said, “You know—it’s a relationship oriented blog—what if people think you and P split and that’s why you stopped writing!”

Never fear. Things are well, it has just been busy.

One of the major reasons for my disappearance is that I spent most of the spring and half the summer working feverishly on my Master’s degree thesis (the one I should have finished a year or two ago but procrastinated on like it was my job), and by the time I was finished writing and defending it I just felt a little burnt out. Not only have I not written for the blog, I basically stopped writing entirely, and it’s time for that to change.

I really missed writing, and like exercise, it’s way too easy to fall out of the practice of it and then just stop entirely. Blogging primes the mind and the fingers for other types of writing, so it’s time to get back in the groove.

So what does “Thulo Manche” mean? I promised S-di that my first blog post back was going to mention this…

The summer raced by—the first half full of sweaty evenings and weekends working in an un-air-conditioned office with P; he working on his phd dissertation and I on my thesis. We rarely saw anyone unless they were dropping by the office to say hello. Then P’s grandfather passed away, and a week later I was in a car accident that sadly totaled our car. These two events are enough to shake up anyone, but with the looming thesis deadline I had to keep working.

Then P went away to Alaska for a workshop, and I went to my school for a week-long Capstone seminar to finish my thesis defense. Cue more long days–of academic presentations and intense focus. A day after finishing my Masters I flew to Alaska to meet P, but in true C and P fashion, our “vacation” was spent driving across the state, seeing beautiful glacier topped mountains, the ocean, and vast stretches of wilderness. It was an amazing experience, but not necessarily a restful one, as with daylight stretching until late in the night and early in the morning, we spent much of our time up and about, experiencing the countryside.

Upon returning, work geared up. This year we have the largest number of international students ever—over 1000 at our small university, with only two administrators working on immigration and cultural programming for the students—the beginning of the school year, with international orientation and student registration, kept me moving at a fast pace. In addition I started two new campus-wide cultural-focused programs which took additional time.

As August closed we invited friends over for my birthday, and S-di said, “You are such a Thulo Manche these days! It’s so hard to see you!”

“What?” I asked… I understood the Nepali words “thulo” meaning “big” and “manche” meaning “person.” I was certain she was trying to call me fat. “I’m not a thulo manche!” I protested.

“Yes you are!” she teased, “If I want to see you I have to call your ‘secretary’… too busy all the time. Such a thulo manche!

“S-di, don’t call me fat, I could lose a few pounds, but please!”

“No, no—thulo manche—you are a ‘big person’ now… so important, running here and there, busy all the time. Now your friends need to schedule an appointment to say hello!”

So I’m officially declaring that I am not a thulo manche… I’ve just taken a little break, but now I’m back, and I look forward to hearing from you all again too!

Yeah! :)

11 responses to “Thulo Manche

  1. welcome back, missed your writings :)

  2. Lol, this is why direct translations don’t really work for languages like Nepali. You tend to hear a lot of ‘grow up to be a thulo manche’ blessings during Dashain, as a kid.

  3. It’s so great to see you blogging again! Congrats on finishing your Masters!

  4. Thanks! :)

  5. Welcome back and congratulations on finishing your thesis! Can I put in a request? I would love to read Part 2 of Gori Watching.

  6. Welcome Back Thulo Manche! side note: I was just a little too excited that I could read and understand “Thulo Manche” haha even though it’s simple I also understood it to mean what it is ment to. :D I guess the Nepali culture here is rubbing off on me

  7. No offense, but I think your blog lost the purpose these days. You started with writing about complications, surprises, uncertainties, adventures etc. of your relationship with P. It was kind of a unique relationship and you had all these fun stuff that sounded interesting. Now you are married, you know each other for long enough, you have a usual surrounding, usual routine, all those adventures and uncertainties disappeared. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not bad at all. Maybe bad for us readers but not for you.

    Well you can still write about all these new things you encountered after marriage, and maybe plans for kids :) etc but I don’t think you have the same interest as before. I really think that you don’t get similar kind of happiness by updating your blog these days like you used to. Work, school etc. are just excuses, you had them before as well.

    Hey, enjoy your life. It’s Ok to be “Thulo manche.” I hope I didn’t piss you off with my straightforward comment. If I did, prove me wrong, lot of people will benefit from that. :)

  8. Heey, was super excited to see a new entry. :-) I’ve become a big fan, and have read back through most of your old entries. Stumbled upon your blog after meeting my boyfriend, who’s Nepalese and in college. Your blog has given me a lot of insight, and a LOT of laughs. Glad you and P are well. ^.^

  9. Shubha pharkina. This is probably not what to say or even the right way to say it if it was the thing to say. Trying to say, “happy return” because that’s as close as I can come to “welcome back” in Nepali. Either way, glad to see you return to the blog world.

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